Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Open Letter to Hipsters

Are you really so unbelievably fashionable that the concept of safety elludes you? Put on a fucking helmet the next time you take your fixie for a spin in your arm warmers and sheer tights, wouldya?
If I had to count how many of you and your brethren I see swerving in and out of traffic like you're part of some American Apparel parade in your 95% spandex body sock that can be worn as a skirt AND a wristlet- I'd pass out.
Get over yourselves and strap one on. Or swear to god, I'm gonna clothesline all y'all the next time I see you.

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